Ouch

Warning this blog is about boobs and breastfeeding...

So, I have always had issues with my yabos. We have never seen eye to eye. I always wanted big ones. Well not big just like a good size like a small C. Instead I am flat as a board (I think it was all the ballet. Sure I couldn't get the pin thin body but the small bubbies, I get.)

When I was about 22 I finally came to terms with my flat chestedness. I liked it because I liked the way I could wear shirts that I couldn't if I was big. Then when I became pregnant I thought "Aw crap my boobs are going to grow." I didn't like that. My friends said "Hey your boobs are going to get bigger." Then looked at me like I had a second head when I started to pout. I didn't want for them to grow. Be careful what you wish for...

So I had Lex or rather he is removed from me. Then the lactation consultants start trying to teach me how to breastfeed my baby. They do this right after your baby is born. I believe this is a huge bonding experience for you and your newborn. Why? Because you and your baby are so out of it that all you can think of is how nuts these women are. Don't they know what you've just been through?

I thought it was weird that they kept asking me if my breasts grew during pregnancy. They did but only a tiny bit. So here I am trying to nurse my baby and my stupid chichi's betray me yet again! That's right I'm not producing enough milk.

I feel like a failure and I hate my bazoongas even more now. Jerks.

So it's not that I'm not making the moo moo juice it's just not enough. The lactation lady suggested I take this herbal supplement called Goats Rue. Turns out it's this miracle pill that is supposed to help your milk come in. In fact women that adopt children can take it and nurse their adoptive children.

Mine came in the mail yesterday. Which is funny because I always made this joke about waiting for my Tatas to come in the mail. I took it and of course was a little skeptical but I'll be a son of a gun! I ache! Something that I didn't experience when I was younger. So that's a sign. I'm still waiting for my milk to come in. I don't want to buy formula anymore. It's expensive and smells gross!

So keep your fingers crossed. I guess if I get breasts it won't be the worst thing in the world.

Monday Monday

So it's another week. I am bound and determined to keep motivated and keep working out. I'm about to hop into the shower and then off to the market with Turtle.

I plan on doing a modified SoBe since I am still nursing Lex. I do have to eat some carbs. I'm not however going to go crazy. Plus I shall continue my exercising. I'm totally going to win at this weight loss game.

Tomorrow starts a new chapter in the Garcia household. David starts his new job so we wish him luck.

Time to start this day!!!

And it continues...

I am proud of myself! I have lost 25 lbs. Okay that may just be from having Lex. It has however kept me motivated to keep working out. I must confess I was lazy two days this week and I didn't walk on the treadmill today but, David and I walked around Spotsy Mall so there's my cardio.

Granted I did have pizza for lunch and pastaroni with dinner. Meh...as long as I keep exercising I should be good.

I'm waiting for my South Beach Books to come in. David and I went to Costco today and bought a whole bunch of meat. Seriously nothing but meat. I plan on just making a protein and veggies until I get my cookbooks.

Man though I'm really digging this whole exercising thing. I can't wait to get into good enough shape to go out jogging around downtown. I just might meet my goal of running a marathon by Lex's first birthday!

Day One...

Look at that couple. I know I know we are so good looking it hurts to look directly at us. This picture was taken on our Honeymoon in front of The real House of Seven Gables in Salem. Believe it or not I think we can actually look better. I mean Angelina and Brad will be hating on us! So my hubby and I are going on a diet and training to run a marathon by our Turtles first birthday.

I have in my shopping cart on Amazon South Beach Books. Come on payday!!! I am going to get the original South Beach Diet Book, the receipe guide plus the reference guide. It's neat it comes complete with grocery lists.

As many couples do David and I have put on weight since we got together. Thanks to my addiction to fast food. Neither one of us really likes eating junk food but we sure do A LOT! I have said to David that I do not want to become like Roseanne and Dan! So much so that I am printing out a picture of them and putting it on the fridge. Also now that we have Turtle I do not want him to be chubby like I was. Plus hello! Diabetes runs on both sides of the family.

Why South Beach you ask? Well a couple of years ago my Mom, Dad and I went on it. It was before my brother's wedding and we wanted to look good. I lasted a week because I'm lazy. In that first week however I lost my sweet tooth (which was amazing) and 6 pounds. My parents stayed on it for awhile and they lost a lot of weight. Then they fell off of it. You know what? They haven't gained all of their weight back.

It's really not that hard. I mean the first two weeks is because it's very restrictive. The receipes are good and easy. So we shall see how it goes.

I am going to get on the treadmill as we speak and walk for ten minutes. Baby steps. I am completely out of shape. So I am starting out small and walking on the treadmill at an easy pace. I did just have surgery afterall. When I was a party kid I would go out and dance at least once a week. It was awesome cardio! I should do that again except not get into the drinking.

Nursing Turtle is helping the weight come off plus drastically increased my water drinking. Sweet!!! My skin is going to look gooooooood!!!!! I'm obesessed with my complexion even though I've never had an acne problem. Hydration hydration hydration!!!!

We don't have a scale but pounds don't really matter to me because I am going to go by how I look. I weighed 140 lbs when I was 22 and looked damn good, but I think I can do better this time around.

So here we go!

New goal

So something has come over me. I think I've been inspired by how fast my belly has gone down (thanks breast feeding.) I used to be thin. Thin and hot with long hair. I miss being 22. So since it's been two weeks since I had Turtle and I'm almost back to my prebaby weight, I'm going the distance.

Around Lex's first birthday I want to run my first marathon. So after I have fully healed from my c section I plan on beginning my training. I hope I don't pull a Meggie and actually do it.

I will post my progress here when I start. I would like to be svelte Meggie again!

Turtle Turtle

So...I'm finally getting around to blogging about my sweet baby boy. He's asleep right now so I thought I would take advantage and also try to sneak in a nap. Here's the amazing adventure I've been on for the past week.

On Monday June 29th I was admitted to Mary Washington Hospital to be induced. I took a birthing class and they said try not to let them induce you. I should've listened or not...I'll explain in a bit.

When they induce the give you Pitocin which kicks starts labor, before hand though they give you a hormone to kind of prep you. I forget what it's called. That's the reason you come in the night before. I had heard how Pitocin can make labor much more painful. I wouldn't know about that. Why? The hormone they gave me and I didn't get along, it was the devil! It started contractions. They were sooooo painful and so close together that the damn Lamaze breathing didn't work. I was hysterically sobbing and just about broke David's hand. The Nurse said she had never seen that happen before. She kept giving me a painkiller but it only worked for like twenty minutes and eventually stopped working all together. I threw up I was in so much pain. David made the comment that he had never seen someone fill up a bag so much. Gross!

They decided that my poor body had had enough and removed the hormone which was supposed to hopefully end the contractions. They examed me and after ALL that I was still 1cm dilated like I was when I got examed at 4:30 p.m the night before. It was about 3:30 a.m. I was beat and worn out and still sobbing because the contractions would not stop. David felt helpless because there was nothing I could do and was quiet the whole time.

Since I had had such a strong reaction the Doctor on call okayed me for an epidural which is unheard of at 1 cm. I had wanted a complete natural birth but had said that I'm no fool and no when to throw in the towel. So I got my epidural which was hard for them to do as I was having contractions every 2 minutes. Epidural...my new best friend!!!!

Because I was all numb and could finally relax they decided to go ahead and give me the pitocin. So at 7 in the morning they put it in my drip. I didn't feel a thing. They said I was having contractions, I couldn't tell you if I was because I felt nothing!!!! I was so exhausted and all I wanted to do was sleep but they kept checking on me and examing me and giving me more pitocin. Breaking my water yada yada yada...Then that's when the trouble started.

They had noticed earlier that Lex's heart rate was dropping. Nothing alarming but they wanted to keep an eye on it. I remained calm because if I stressed out that would only make it worse. That's what David was there for. At about 1:00 p.m on June 30th the Doctor came in and told me words I will never forget. "Your baby's heart rate has dropped down as low as 90. We can do a C section now and you can have a healthy baby or wait but there could be further complications."

That was the single most scary moment of my life but I couldn't think about that. I didn't even ask David what he thought. I told the Doctor "Do it."

David went and got his parents and my parents to come see me before I was taken away. My Mom started crying and I told her not to worry just to pray to Saint Jude (the Patron Saint of Desperate Cases.)

At 1:30 I was wheeled into the O.R. and was prepped for surgery. David came in at 1:45 and at 1:51 Alexander was born. Hearing his little cry was such a surreal moment. They held him up over the little curtain thing and David took a picture then they whisked him away to clean him off. I had a hissy fit on the table because I had had enough! I wanted out. I wanted to take my baby and run away. I was still being put together when this happened. Then I had a crazy attack of the shivers. My teeth were chattering and everything. The anesthesiologist gave me some Demerol and I was all goooooood. David then brought Lex over to me when he was all wrapped up so I could see him. I wanted to hold him soooo badly but I had to wait.

Fast forward to a week later and all I do is stare at him. It's weird because I never knew it was so possible to love someone so much. I love his little happy baby noises. I love when we stare at each other. I love when he falls asleep in my arms. I even love when he wakes me up in the middle of the night. I'm someones Mom now and that's very very peculiar. He's such a cute baby and he's also a very good baby. Except when I change him. He does not like to have his diaper changed. Man does he scream bloody murder! You would think I was beating him.

I've had my staples removed and am still a little sore from the surgery. Sometimes my back aches and I have a dull headache. In the end it was all worth it. The horrible pain was worth it. I would do it again in a heartbeat.